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Screenwriting Help E-Mail (Previous)

Updated every Monday, one selected e-mail will be posted and answered here each week. With many years of experience in the film and television business, I look forward to providing answers to your questions (often with a humorous eye) about screenwriting or the entertainment industry in general.  Please send your e-mailed questions to: Script Advisor.  You may also wish to visit our Screenwriting Help E-Mails - The Archives.

This week's question: 

DCH, it's been soooo hot and I've been so lethargic, but I need to keep screen writing.  Do you have any words of wisdom?


This week's Answer: 

A Hot Script

I do, Kacey (and I'm glad you wrote to me).  You said you need to keep screen writing.  Are you writing on screens?  I've never done that before.  I thought about it, but never had the nerve to actually do it.  My grandmother's backdoor screen was always BANGING and thought about writing on it many a time.  I capitalized "banging" because that's what you do, capitalize sounds when you're writing a screenplay.  I don't know if you would still capitalize "banging" if you were writing on a screen, though.  I'd have to check with WGA to find that one out.  But that could get complicated, too, because I think WGA has one of its offices in a rural area; a little office out in the middle of nowhere  (wherever that is.  I always wondered where nowhere was and how you got to the middle of it.) and I do believe (or I should say "reckon" -- or "reck'n) that it has a screen door in the back, which could make things complicated if somebody has actually written on the WGA out-in-the-middle-of-nowhere office when you mention screenwriting, being that the WGA constituents there may misconstrue the intention and assume that someone was referring to their back door.

But, in case, Kacey (I like that way that sounds:  case, Kacey), you are referring to screenwriting as the act of writing a screenplay, I know what it's like to feel lethargic and not feel enthused about writing the next scene, or even the next word.  And then with this heat wave we're having ("We're Having A Heat Wave... A Tropical Heat Wave"), it's easy to feel like a sack of wet potatoes or bananas (and everybody knows bananas aren't known for their screenwriting prowess -- although they have won more Best Screenplay Oscars than potatoes; I'll grant you that).  My suggestion is to stay as cool as you can.  Maybe even try writing in the shower.  (Of course, you'll need a waterproof pen and paper set.  Or a waterproof computer, which I think is on the market now for $400,000, which means you'll need to make a big sale on your next screenplay to at least break even.)  Or you could try writing very early in the morning when it's cooler.  Open those windows, let in the lovely trills and calls of your neighborhood birds, the pleasing sounds of the BEEP, BEEP, BEEP of the backing up garbage trucks.  Whatever it takes to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in order to embrace the day's screenwriting.

Or... you could go to Antarctica and just phone it in.

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