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This week's Answer:
Screenwriting
Without Being "KNOCKED"
Around I appreciate the
question, Distraught. (Are you, by any chance,
related to the Dattraught family? Just
checking. I hear the Distraughts and the Dattraughts
are still feuding. Imagine that.) I
know it does take a disciplined mind to continually return
one's screenplay even when the taxman isn't
knocking on your door. The knocking, alone, can take
you off your game. (Although, I grew up in a little
room over a door factory and heard test knocking all day
and night, so, when I feel distracted and can't seem to
get back to writing my screenplay, I pay neighborhood
children to knock on my door for hours on end to help
relax me, remembering my own childhood and those wonder
knocking years.) But, since you apparently don't
have the same background, I can see how that knocking
could affect you. What to do, What to do? I've
got it. Put a sign on your front door (the outside
side) that reads:
NO
KNOCKING
Or, if you have a
doorbell, the sign could read:
PLEASE
RING THE BELL
Or, if you don't have a
bell and you don't want any knocking, it could read:
PLEASE
GO AWAY. ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE A TAXMAN
Or you could use a sign
that you can buy from my online store (which doesn't
exist, but could if I keep getting this brilliant
merchandizing ideas) that reads:
SCREENWRITER
AT WORK
That should definitely
do it. Taxman don't want to have to deal with
screenwriters. But, just in case you want to make a
stronger statement, this one always works well:
BEWARE
OF SCREENWRITER
Now you can screenwrite
in peace. And always remember to capitalize "KNOCKED."
It is a sound, after all.
And a beautiful one, at
that.
DcH
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