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Screenwriting Help E-Mail (Previous)

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This week's question: 

My monitor sizzled and smoked and I just don't think I can write my screenplay on my backup 14 inch monitor.  Do you have any advice, Script Advisor?

Maynard C. 


This week's Answer: 

Will, Abe, and John

Yes, Maynard, I do have some advice.

ADVICE FOR MAYNARD:

1.  Next time, don't barbeque with your monitor on the grill.

2.  Next time, don't choose a monitor that is addicted to nicotine even before you get it out of the box.

3.  14-inch monitors are not supposed to be backing up, but rather, are intended to be stationary.

I don't mean to be too brittle here, Maynard, but a little tough love might be in order here.  Yes, the older smaller models of monitors are not as nice to utilize and we all want LCD's these days, with their slick thinness and sleek sleekness (it's like you could just reach into that underwater screensaver scene and grab yourself a fish, doesn't it?).  But, all I can say (although I know I'll say more -- as I always do, much to the chagrin of my reader(s) whose only wish sometimes is for my columns to end and do so as soon as possible) is where would we all be if the some of the illustrious writers of days gone by had thought as you do?  Case in point:  Would we have all the amazing tragedies, comedies, and sonatas, and more, from William Shakespeare if he had complained about having to work with a small monitor?  (All the noteworthy Shakespeare historians know full well that the bard only used a 10-inch.).  

More cases in point (or points; or pointed cases):  How do you think the Gettysburg Address came about?  Oh, ye of little literature knowledge, listen while I tell the tale.  We all know Abe had weak eyes and many of us have been told that it was because he read so much by candle- and firelight.  Not true.  Abe educated himself because he was willing to endure a -- now get this and let the tears fall if they must -- an 8-inch monitor!  Imagine the eye-strain our former President of these here United States had to endure.  But he kept writing.  He didn't complain that his monitor was too small to finish The Gettysburg Address.  Oh, no.  Not he.

And imagine, if you will, what John Hancock had to endure when he was forced to cut and paste his signature, using only a 5-inch black-and-white monitor!

So, next time you find yourself wanting to complain that your 17-inch flat-screen LCD should be a 19-inch, just remember...

Will

Abe

and John.  (Has anybody here seen my old friend...?)

DcH

 


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