This week's Answer:
Abe, and John
Yes, Maynard, I do have some advice.
Next time, don't barbeque with your monitor on the grill.
Next time, don't choose a monitor that is addicted to nicotine even
before you get it out of the box.
14-inch monitors are not supposed to be backing up, but rather, are
intended to be stationary.
I don't mean to be too brittle here,
Maynard, but a little tough love might be in order here. Yes,
the older smaller models of monitors are not as nice to utilize and we
all want LCD's these days, with their slick thinness and sleek
sleekness (it's like you could just reach into that underwater
screensaver scene and grab yourself a fish, doesn't it?). But,
all I can say (although I know I'll say more -- as I always do, much
to the chagrin of my reader(s) whose only wish sometimes is for my
columns to end and do so as soon as possible) is where would we all be
if the some of the illustrious writers of days gone by had thought as
you do? Case in point: Would we have all the amazing
tragedies, comedies, and sonatas, and more, from William Shakespeare
if he had complained about having to work with a small monitor?
(All the noteworthy Shakespeare historians know full well that the
bard only used a 10-inch.).
More cases in point (or points; or
pointed cases): How do you think the Gettysburg Address came
about? Oh, ye of little literature knowledge, listen while I
tell the tale. We all know Abe had weak eyes and many of us have
been told that it was because he read so much by candle- and
firelight. Not true. Abe educated himself because he was
willing to endure a -- now get this and let the tears fall if they
must -- an 8-inch monitor! Imagine the eye-strain our former
President of these here United States had to endure. But he
kept writing. He didn't complain that his monitor was too small
to finish The Gettysburg Address. Oh, no. Not he.
And imagine, if you will, what John
Hancock had to endure when he was forced to cut and paste his
signature, using only a 5-inch black-and-white monitor!
So, next time you find yourself
wanting to complain that your 17-inch flat-screen LCD should be a
19-inch, just remember...
and John. (Has anybody here
seen my old friend...?)